kaypo
Does Singaporeans have the "mind your own business" mindset? Maybe, maybe not. Let me recount some adventures I had.
[ONE]
It was a rainy day, my friends were having their friendly basketball match in the rain while I was sitting under the void deck watching. A malay student of my age walked past me, heading off to another block. The path ahead of him is not sheltered. I offered to shelter him across but he rejected me kindly. Well, maybe he wasn't press for time. Then, another old lady was trying to cross the same road too and I offered my help. She rejected my help but I insisted, she's grateful for that umbrella. When I turned back, I saw the malay boy running in the rain. He smiled at me shyly.
[TWO]
Another rainy day, I offered to shelter a maid from the bus stop to the nearest HDB block. She keeps saying "no need" but her head is already under my umbrella so I just shelter her anyway. Good think she is thankful for my umbrella.
[THREE]
While waiting for lift, I saw a maid carrying a basket full of groceries trying to walk up the stairs. As lift is not installed on every floor, she got to climb up a 6 flights staircase to reach 3rd storey. As a gesture of goodwill, I helped her. She did say "nevermind" but soon realise that the basket is too heavy for her. Great to help someone but I got to climb up another 6 storey to reach my house.
[FOUR]
I was walking around aimlessly at my neighbourhood and I saw this old malay uncle carrying a bag of rice. My poor estimation tell me that it's about 5kg. Seeing that the old uncle is having a hard time, I offered my hand. He rejected my help but he says that he's shoulder is in pain when carrying heavy item. I offered my help again. He rejected again but thanked me this time. I told him to take care and I walk off.
What has these four incidents have in common? No, I'm not trying to "show off" my kindness. The common thing: they rejected help although they need it. Notice I use need. People are just too shy to accept help from passer-by stranger. Well, I also don't dare to accept help from strangers.
Since primary school, we are installed with the theory, "don't accept request from strangers". I guess that's why. You never know if the stranger that offers help is trying to trick you into his scam.
It's hard to offer help. It's harder to accept help. Am I right?
If you see an elderly having diffculty crossing the road, will you help even when the elderly is walking in the opposite direction of you? Some will, some don't.
There is a chinese saying that goes "hao xin you hao bao". Meaning, do good and you will be rewarded. Well, I don't mind if I'm rewarded for good deed or not. I just like helping people who are in need. Even if you don't intend to repay me for my deed. However, some people abuse my help though.
Remember in secondary school, there is this Singapore Kindness Movement (SKM) that forces student to complete a number of good deed in a year. This SKM is so stupid. Doing good deed is not something that can be measured or graded. It comes from the heart.
Once during secondary school (again), we were each given a donation card. It's to collect funds for the school's renovation. One of my female friend didn't meet the minimum expectation for the funds and my teacher says that she "has no love for the school". My friend got so upsetted and say "no money means no love? Why not you donate money to my family?" I'm equally upset. How can a teaching personel say such words?
I'm sure most secondary school student have attended Flag Day before. When we went to submit the donation tin, the staff would stare at us hardly and try to weight with his hand and the meter in his heart. One of my friend got to go out and ask for more donation as they felt that it's not enough. They even threaten not to give him CIP hours if he didn't reach the target. So, that's how we are taught. We weren't even taught the proper way. I wonder why so many foreign students want to come to Singapore for "education".
Some people read "help" as "kaypo". "kaypo" is the hokkien word for "busybody". Case study please. Alakazam needs help but didn't approach anyone. Barbie sense that Alakazam needs help and offer to lend a helping hand. Alakazam replies "none of your business". Isn't that rude? If you don't need the help, kindly reject it nicely.
Being a busybody type, I have a dream.
[ONE]
It was a rainy day, my friends were having their friendly basketball match in the rain while I was sitting under the void deck watching. A malay student of my age walked past me, heading off to another block. The path ahead of him is not sheltered. I offered to shelter him across but he rejected me kindly. Well, maybe he wasn't press for time. Then, another old lady was trying to cross the same road too and I offered my help. She rejected my help but I insisted, she's grateful for that umbrella. When I turned back, I saw the malay boy running in the rain. He smiled at me shyly.
[TWO]
Another rainy day, I offered to shelter a maid from the bus stop to the nearest HDB block. She keeps saying "no need" but her head is already under my umbrella so I just shelter her anyway. Good think she is thankful for my umbrella.
[THREE]
While waiting for lift, I saw a maid carrying a basket full of groceries trying to walk up the stairs. As lift is not installed on every floor, she got to climb up a 6 flights staircase to reach 3rd storey. As a gesture of goodwill, I helped her. She did say "nevermind" but soon realise that the basket is too heavy for her. Great to help someone but I got to climb up another 6 storey to reach my house.
[FOUR]
I was walking around aimlessly at my neighbourhood and I saw this old malay uncle carrying a bag of rice. My poor estimation tell me that it's about 5kg. Seeing that the old uncle is having a hard time, I offered my hand. He rejected my help but he says that he's shoulder is in pain when carrying heavy item. I offered my help again. He rejected again but thanked me this time. I told him to take care and I walk off.
What has these four incidents have in common? No, I'm not trying to "show off" my kindness. The common thing: they rejected help although they need it. Notice I use need. People are just too shy to accept help from passer-by stranger. Well, I also don't dare to accept help from strangers.
Since primary school, we are installed with the theory, "don't accept request from strangers". I guess that's why. You never know if the stranger that offers help is trying to trick you into his scam.
It's hard to offer help. It's harder to accept help. Am I right?
If you see an elderly having diffculty crossing the road, will you help even when the elderly is walking in the opposite direction of you? Some will, some don't.
There is a chinese saying that goes "hao xin you hao bao". Meaning, do good and you will be rewarded. Well, I don't mind if I'm rewarded for good deed or not. I just like helping people who are in need. Even if you don't intend to repay me for my deed. However, some people abuse my help though.
Remember in secondary school, there is this Singapore Kindness Movement (SKM) that forces student to complete a number of good deed in a year. This SKM is so stupid. Doing good deed is not something that can be measured or graded. It comes from the heart.
Once during secondary school (again), we were each given a donation card. It's to collect funds for the school's renovation. One of my female friend didn't meet the minimum expectation for the funds and my teacher says that she "has no love for the school". My friend got so upsetted and say "no money means no love? Why not you donate money to my family?" I'm equally upset. How can a teaching personel say such words?
I'm sure most secondary school student have attended Flag Day before. When we went to submit the donation tin, the staff would stare at us hardly and try to weight with his hand and the meter in his heart. One of my friend got to go out and ask for more donation as they felt that it's not enough. They even threaten not to give him CIP hours if he didn't reach the target. So, that's how we are taught. We weren't even taught the proper way. I wonder why so many foreign students want to come to Singapore for "education".
Some people read "help" as "kaypo". "kaypo" is the hokkien word for "busybody". Case study please. Alakazam needs help but didn't approach anyone. Barbie sense that Alakazam needs help and offer to lend a helping hand. Alakazam replies "none of your business". Isn't that rude? If you don't need the help, kindly reject it nicely.
Being a busybody type, I have a dream.
